Sunday, January 14, 2007
I just want to be Noticed
It must be some funky moon phase because we've had more people presenting with psychiatric concerns than usual, and most of them have had more drama than the usual Tylenol overdose or suicidal ideation.

Among the many, a few stood out. Those were:

  • The girl with the hair scissors, nail file and dual pencil sharpener hidden in her underwear. (Prior to knowing the patient's gender the social worker noted that the patient had to be a girl, as a boy would never hide stuff like that in his skivvies!)
  • The boy who "fell" down the stairs 48 hours ago, received an immunization 8 hours ago, and now, suddenly, cannot walk or move his legs, and his hand grips are weak. Interestingly enough after a full work-up at a referring hospital, a $600 ambulance ride and a late night assessment at the specialty hospital he was given some ibuprofen which dramatically improved his sensation and mobility, to the point that he was able to walk out of the hospital to go home.
  • The lady who wanted us to believe that she was too ill from her Tylenol overdose and subsequent Mucomyst therapy that she couldn't participate in a mental health assessment yet, so she pretended to fall asleep in her chair, then slid to the floor and refused to respond to people calling her (but magically could prevent her hand hitting her face when it was dropped over her) until someone hit upon the brilliant idea of saying "You must be so tired after all of this. Come on with me and I'll tuck you into bed for a nice nap." She rolled over, moaned and crawled forward, then was assisted to her feet and led to a room where she proceeded to stick her fingers down her throat to make herself vomit (all over herself and her bed while refusing to use a k-basin) for the next 4 hours.

All I can say is: I am so lucky.

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